Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Shoulda shoulda shoulda

I guess I couldn't have left Los Angeles without getting at least one comment on either my weight or my lack of husband and children.

For a good part of my 20's, I escaped the husband and children lecture.  Clearly, since I was still in school, I needed to focus on that instead.  The weight issue is another story.

I'm Filipino.  I was taught to finish all my food because of those goddamned kids in China and Africa (even though we also came from a third-world country).  Holidays are tables fool of food (as you can see from my Christmas post) and eating the whole night.  Yes, I played outside instead of watching TV for the most part (in fact, I did not grow up watching Saved By The Bell like so many of my friends).

So, I still got chubby.  It probably didn't help that after swimming class at the YMCA, we would go to McDonald's.  It also probably didn't help that when I was around 5 or 6, I thought I needed to weigh 50 or 60 pounds, and that a 0 would be tacked onto my age as I got older.  Weird, I know.  I learned quickly that that wasn't true.  I don't weigh 270 lbs.

And while the doctors would lecture me about my weight, I was still okay with myself.  Then I started going home to visit for the holidays.  My paternal grandmother, whom I love but scares me a little, starts grabbing at my arms, "You should lose weight!  You'd be pretty if you did!"

Yikes.  I started avoided visiting her because of the comments and the arm grabbing.

My mom was another culprit.  Not a visit would go by without a comment on my weight - at least within the first 24 hours.  She would then follow her comment by saying that it's still healthy that I had fat on my body, and I would be regarded as wealthy in the Philippines.

In the past couple of years, I started getting more serious about my weight.  I joined an expensive gym, do workout DVDs at home, started counting my calories.  I lost maybe 10 lbs.  Then I started focusing more on eating more vegetables and got into riding my bike to and from work.  I lost another 10 lbs.

Still nowhere near where I'd like to be, but I'm only really unhappy with my body around my family and when I get on the scale.

But this past vacation, I almost didn't hear anything about my weight.  Almost.

nom nom nom

It's only been recently, since I've finished school, that I've gotten comments about getting married and having a family.  My maternal grandmother is the one pushing this topic this time.

The general gist is that I need to hurry up and have kids because I'm getting older.  But, now I'm getting it from my aunts and uncles on my maternal side as well.  Just when I think I was going to survive another holiday without getting lectured....well...2 days before I left for Boston, it happened.

With that, I now present to you the dialogue between my family and me at around 11:30pm on New Years Eve.

Tito E:  You know, you should have babies now.
Me:  WHAT?? Oh my god...I'm soooo not there right now!  I'm still a baby myself!
Tito E:  Well, the older you get the harder it will be to have kids.  So you should hurry up.
Me:  But what about all my other cousins?  Are you saying the same to them?  They're older than me!
Tito E:  Well, you have a partner.
Tita B: already have a boyfriend.
Me:  I'm so not ready to have a family right now.
Tito E:  Well, as long as you have kids before you're 35.
Nanay (my mom):  Hah?? I'm not ready to be a Lola (grandmother)!
Me:  Thank you!! I'm glad at least we're on the same page here!
Nanay: should lose weight first or else you'll have a hard time....



  1. Awh thats mean!! Its completely normal for people to wait until their 30s to have babies.

  2. I'm thankful my younger brother is coupled up and halfway down the aisle...takes the pressure off me. Mom is afraid I'm going to be "old & alone"...This has been an issue since my teens and of course I have relationship issues :P

    Ah, they mean well!


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